Before coming to know the Lord Jesus, I used to think the Bible was changed every year. When I first heard about God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit, I thought Christianity changes every time.
And when I began to be a friend of Jonathan, now my husband, I said to him, ‘I don’t mean to offend you, but I don’t believe in religion. Religion is man-made. I believe in a relationship with God’. But he said, ‘That’s what Christianity is, a relationship with God’.
I never used to understand why some people wore a crucifix. I know a man died on a cross and I always pondered that question, but never looked into it. But my journey was already towards Jesus, although I didn’t know it.
I was born into a Muslim family. I found myself in darkness, and void of much love. I was exposed to violence and depression, as well as demonic activity.
I was always interested to know how life, myself and everything had come about. I felt there was a purpose to everything, but in Islam I felt a void and darkness. Something about it never felt right. After much rejection, hurt and oppression, I came to a conclusion that all religions are man-made.
Then I thought, ‘That makes me an atheist’. But I couldn’t accept that, because deep in my heart I knew there is a God who created me, this earth, the heavens, and everybody and everything else.
So I started to speak to the God who gave me life. It was this God who spoke to me when I wanted to end my life and whom I trusted in every time things got bad. It was this God who kept shining light into my life, when darkness and people tried to destroy me. It was he whom I cried out to for help, when I lashed out on my family, people in school and teachers, because I had become so destructive. It was he who transformed my life, brought me peace and showed me how to love.
It was this God who brought me out of the Muslim enclosure and who told me about dangers that were being plotted by a sibling I trusted wholeheartedly. It was he who held me and my needs and filled me with love, joy and peace. I felt cleansed.
I was in New Zealand when this happened. My hopes were coming true in New Zealand, but God directed me back to the UK. Through him I heard a message being played on a DVD saying, ‘Jesus is at your door. All you have to do is let him in’.
I asked God to show me about Jesus. He showed me that he is in control and I should have faith in him; that through Jesus there is peace, love and joy; and that these blessings come through the death of Jesus on the cross.
I started to research about Jesus. God revealed things to me step by step. Deep in my heart I believed, so I picked up my Bible and read it from the beginning. I had many questions, but God showed me that I should read his Word, the Holy Bible, to find the answers. It was a revelation. I kept asking God about Jesus, and my eyes were opened. I knew deep in my heart that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, King of kings and Lord of lords.
It is he who picks me up every time I fall, who loves me so much that he came and took the pain and punishment for my sins. In Jesus Christ I have eternal life. This was the God who watched over me since I was a little girl, although I never knew him then. Jesus Christ is my Lord and Saviour. I trust him; he is my stronghold, refuge and best friend.
Jesus has restored my relationship with my family. I praise and thank him that he is working in their lives too. If you cry out to him, he will come to you too. When you know Jesus, you find freedom, eternal love and life.